What to Write in a Sympathy Card
Deciding what to write in a sympathy card can feel overwhelming. What can you possibly say to people when they’ve just lost someone so important?
The fact that you are saying something is what matters. As long as you write with care and love, the recipient will appreciate the gesture and be glad to know you’re there for them.
You don’t have to write a lot, and what you say might depend on how well you knew the deceased and his or her surviving family. Here are a few ideas to get you started.
What to Write in a Sympathy Card
“With Deepest Sympathy”
Simple condolences are perfectly fine to use in your card. One or two sentences is enough.
- I’m sorry for your loss.
- Sending you all my love during this time.
- I’m keeping you in my prayers.
“It Was an Honor to Know Him/Her”
If you knew the deceased, say so in your sympathy message.
- I always enjoyed visiting with her at church over the years. She will be missed.
- I feel lucky to have known him. He was an incredible man.
- I met her in college and she never forgot my birthday. I’m so happy to have called her my friend.
“I Remember When…”
Share a short memory you have of the deceased.
- One of my earliest memories is of him taking all the cousins to the water park.
- The first time I met her, she was scraping gum off her shoe–and laughing about it! It didn’t matter what was going on, she always saw the bright side.
- We got together for coffee once a month. I always looked forward to our little date.
“Let Me Know How I Can Help”
Sometimes it’s difficult for someone in mourning to come up with a specific request. So go ahead and be specific yourself:
- Call if you need help watching the kids.
- I’m glad to cook a meal for you any time. Just give me a call.
- Let me know if I can help you run errands, walk the dog, or mow the yard.
“What Not to Write in a Sympathy Card”
Whatever you do, here’s what not to write:
- Don’t focus on details of the death or any illness that might have led up to it. (For example, “At least her suffering is over.”)
- Don’t suggest the death was a “blessing” even if the person had been in pain prior to passing.
- Don’t say you know how the mourners feel or that it will get easier.
Don’t let your concern over what to write in a sympathy card stop you from sending one. As long as you write with love, your message will be received and appreciated.